Hi Friend!!
More than ever life has thrown us into emotional cycles that don’t feel good – fear, anxiety, uncertainty, overwhelm, anger, hopelessness, etc. This is normal given the circumstances of our world. We are experiencing life in a way we never have before.. it’s new. Stress is high and we can react without thinking because of this hyper-state we are in.
Just because we can do it doesn’t mean we have to. We get to choose to feel good and do whatever it takes to make that happen. Right? Right.
The foundation for healing this and for having more peace in life is to have a daily practice where you intentionally align your thoughts and emotions for your day. However, showing up to a daily practice doesn’t mean that as the day unfolds we aren’t triggered.. so, how do we get to know these triggers, get comfortable with the emotional cycle that happens from them, and reflect on ways to shift and improve the next time we find ourselves feeling the same, or similar?
We use these questions to guide us through a cycle that happens. This bring conscious awareness to our thoughts, feelings, and actions so we can fall forward and grow through our experiences.
Getting to Know an Emotional Cycle
Step 1: Describe
Prompting event: What was the triggering event? This is the who, what, when, and where.
Interpretation: What is the story you’re telling yourself about the event? This is the why.
Physical response: What sensations or reactions did you feel in your body?
Urge to act: What did you instantly want to do?
Action: What did you actually do? What did you say? Be specific and don’t hold back truths. Practice compassion and grace.
After effects: What was the consequence of what happened and how you responded?
Step 2: Curiously and Compassionately Reflect
Where in your cycle do you think you could most easily make a change and steer your experience in a different direction? Where’s your most accessible pivot moment, your chance to pause and redirect?
Look at how you interpreted the event, your story—step 2. What other ways are there to see the situation? How might a different way to interpret the situation shift your emotional experience? If you assumed the best about everyone and gave them the benefit of the doubt, if you chose kindness and compassion, what story emerges?
If you had an intense physical response (for example, you got a pounding headache, burst into tears, or started shaking), you most likely need to start with the physiological aspect. When your body is in high alert, you won’t be able to think rationally. What could you do in the moment when you’re experiencing an intense physical response?
This practice gives us a chance to choose love more effortlessly through all of the moments of life. It’s true that it takes some dedication and consistency to get evolve your thinking and behavior and yet sitting down with these questions once a day will feel like such a heavenly dose of self love and do the trick!
I hope these coaching questions serve you as your own self-coach. I would love to hear about your experience with them.. please feel encouraged to share any and all details with me.
Love always,
Annie
